Nurse, heal thyself.

I've worked in a pediatric office for 4 years. I have been exposed to and colonized with a fantastically wide variety of crud. Those cute little people who walk in the front door? A veritable parade ensemble tossing out a plethora of parasitic pathogenic organisms as if they were candy from a float. My hands are perpetually peeling. This is because I wash them 200 times a day. That Geiko lizard looks like SILK next to the skin on my knuckles.

I'm a nurse. We know a few things about infection control. We do our darndest to avoid bringing work home from the office. But it seems, when one of our lot does succumb to the virus du jour, we do it in a big way! No one I work with gets the sniffles. We get a full-blown (no pun intended) sinus Chernobyl-like meltdown resulting in copious amounts of completely disgusting stuff. In nurse fashion, the truly dedicated come to work anyway. We do not get a nagging cough. We get bilateral multi lobe pneumonia. We cough so hard our ears pop. We cough so hard our backs go out. We cough up ridiculous amounts of the afore-mentioned disgusting stuff. And we go to work. I've considered the possible truth that as nurses we may diagnose ourselves with illnesses slightly more severe than the reality--after all, if a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, a lot of knowledge is a hypochondriac's playground. We are very willing to sympathize with and support the martyrdom of the co-worker who risks personal physical collapse to support the team. We respect that go-to-work attitude (of course, we prefer that same colleague remain a safe distance away, lest any of us come into the path of his/her flying germs).

Why is it that the very profession which should know all about rest, recovery, rest, fluids, rest, and rest, is one of the most likely to drag our virulent selves in to the office when we should clearly be staying home making hot toddies and watching bad daytime TV? Why do we preach to our patients about the necessity of taking care of one's health, then totally ignore that advice for ourselves? I asked myself that today as I completely disinfected my work area so as not to expose my co-workers to whatever I'm incubating in my physiological petri dish.

After all, I do NOT want to infect my teammates with the illness I've been carrying around for 5 days. If any one of them catches this crud, I will feel tremendously guilty. I will have to sit and listen to them cough and hack and blow and moan and generally be miserable, because Lord knows if they are sick they will come to work. Just like I did.